Not having an amazing experience at university? You're not alone.
A student named Robert spent most of his orientation week scrolling through online platforms, reading posts about fellow students partying.
"I stayed indoors," Robert remembers, describing the week as the most solitary phase of his life.
Robert's flatmates rarely went out, and his program didn't seem particularly social.
Although he tried by going to taster sessions for different clubs, he couldn't find like-minded individuals.
"I started to lose my self-esteem," he says. "I believed people didn't want to be friends with me, or they didn't appreciate me."
Online Network Judgments
Initially, Robert wasn't considering of attending college and received employment offers for after sixth form.
However he saw his friends enjoying themselves as college students online.
"When you've got to get up for your job during the week at 9:00 and you see someone's been out on midweek, you start feeling the grass is greener," Robert explains.
College Anticipations
Media content and social media can glorify the idea of college existence.
Lots of people begin university with great anticipations for what they think could be the best years of their lives.
Various learners come to university with "optimistic perspectives," says a counselling manager.
Survey Findings
- According to research of first-year attendees early on, the main anxiety was belonging and being accepted
- Additional research by market research agencies, a significant minority said they lacked friendships at university
- Over one-third reported they experienced concern frequently about forming friendships
Personal Experiences
A different attendee's social media content was populated with clips of girls having fun while sharing accommodation in university housing.
However when Alisha moved from London to Sheffield to learn reporting, she found initial days "overwhelming" because of the substance involvement it involved.
She avoids drinking and had not experienced nightlife before.
"I did spend considerable time initially inside my accommodation," she says. "I merely sensed a bit alienated."
Mental Health Considerations
In a 2025 survey of more than 10,000 college learners, 29% said they contemplated withdrawing from studies.
The most common reason was psychological wellbeing, accompanied by monetary worries.
"Concern over these multiple factors is extremely prevalent, and typical," notes a support specialist.
Finding Solutions
Eventually, all three individuals eventually adapted and built connections.
She formed relationships through her course and using online platforms, while another student became more content after being able to move in with friends.
Practical Advice
Regarding his experience, currently in his mid-twenties and in his last year, it was engaging in performance groups and getting a part-time job that supported social connection.
The suggested approach to new attendees struggling to socialize is to simply leave your accommodation and attend organization sample activities.
"Subsequent to periods of continuous participation, individuals become familiar with you," he mentions, "you recognise theirs, and friendships begin forming."
